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    Entries in babywearing (4)

    Friday
    Oct122012

    hangin' tough: a papa's adventures in babywearing

    In honor of International Babywearing Week, the following is a guest post by my partner, Nathan: babywearer extraordinaire.

    I come from a line of Oklahomans whose techniques for baby containing consisted primarily of high chairs for eating, large extended families for passing and holding, and loads of hip-hanging for everything else.  Up to age 18, I'd never even SEEN anyone (not on some school filmstrip of distant lands) wearing their child.  

    When we found out that George was busy growing in the womb, we began the age-old ritual of stockpiling all things baby and parent.  During our childbirth class, we began discussing the kinds of carriers Stefanie would use.  At first, I never assumed that this conversation included me.  Since I had so little prior knowledge of slings and baby wearing, my brain passed right over into support mode.  Quickly, I realized that I could wear the baby, too.  Still, it seemed out of my comfort zone.

    Once George was born, things started to change.  I saw Stef wearing our tiny grumpy baby in the Ergo, taking him everywhere, feeding him, talking to him, comforting him.  I started wearing George around the house.  In no time, even though my college-self tugged at my discomfort with something so "not me," whatever that meant, I immediately felt the benefit of having George so close.  As a newborn he was tough to get to sleep, but in the sling with me, he found a spot to rest easy and did so often.  In those days, I was in the thick of my student teaching internship and spent a lot of time at school, working.  In my hours at home, I had George in the sling.  I could cook with him in there, looking up at me.  I would sing to him and often talk him through everything that I was doing.  At "bedtime," I found a stand-up desk in his changing table and I would work at my laptop as he (and just as importantly, Mama) got some rest.  

    Even though our in-house George-toting was going gangbusters, I was still sheepish to wear George out; it still felt strange.  I don't really remember when I stopped feeling that it wasn't weird to have my baby on me, but, it did.  Yes, even in the extremely liberal town where we lived, I still got some glaring looks or giggles, but I would just kiss George's head and talk to him and feel great that my baby and I were out and about.  That's one of the best things about baby wearing: the freedom it gives families, regardless of their size.  Sadly, so often our culture portrays parents as put-upon martyrs for their children.  Instead, when I have had either of my children in a sling, I feel like we are free.  We are able to go almost anywhere and do almost anything and we can do it together.  My kids have run errands to the post office and learned how everything works.  They've shopped for groceries with me.  I see all of these interactions as learning opportunities and feel like they've better equipped my children to see themselves as active participants in their world. Additionally, being in a traditional relationship, I was happy to introduce George to parenting and gender roles that might not necessarily mesh with culture at large.  I relished the opportunity to share in the role as nurturer.  

    Eventually, I upgraded from a pre-packaged satchel-looking (ed: pocket) sling to a more traditional ring sling. George napped and travelled in it until he practically burst it at the seams.  I remember his transition out of the sling and how, while my back was thanking me for the break, I missed having my little one next to me, sharing life so closely.  Without question, having bonded this way with George helped (and continues to help) us be close, even when eventually I was working 50-60 hours a week.  Understandably, I bet some folks reading this would ask, "If your baby is asleep so much of the time, do you really think you're bonding that much?"  I would argue 100% yes.  I can imagine few more powerful little moments than when a waking baby looks up to see her parent, feeling safe. I see that look on a regular basis and feel incredibly fortunate to have that opportunity that so few dads and non-nursing partners have.

     

    Scary photobooth papa

    By the time Zelda was born, slinging babies was old hat.  Today, I estimate that I have Zelda in the sling for about 20-25 hours a week. I keep a pretty regular work week schedule, but when I'm home, she naps and hangs out with me in Stef's Maya Wrap ring sling (really the best sling ever).  Just as with George, in the evenings Zelda sleeps in the sling with me while I work and Stef has some freedom after a day parenting two kids.  All of the same benefits of slinging George are again present, but added to this are some new benefits.  While slinging George, I showed him that I also acted as a nurturer and now that I so regularly wear Zelda, he sees it second-hand (Luckily, we are surrounded by some great dads, which helps reinforce men as gentle caregivers!).  As a family, we are also better able to parent both kids.  If we go out, we as parents can focus more intimately on both kids.   

    Baby wearing has allowed me to a more engaged member of the family. Working at times three jobs outside of the house, I've struggled over the years to make my time with my family as meaningful as possible.  Having my children in a sling lets us be more active as a family unit.  With Zelda in the sling, we can all go outside and play a game of George's choosing and we are ALL actively engaged. Zelda is part of the action and enjoying the movement, sights and sounds.  And George can have both parents playing with him at once.  I can cook dinner with Zelda in the sling while Stef and George read a book or play a game.

    These days, baby wearing lets me more easily take both kids out, but rather than the looks I got as a new dad with a baby in a sling, I now get plenty of coos and smiles (gee, I wonder if perception has anything to do with this).   I relish the days when I wear my ratty jeans and flannel shirt and the world gets to see my big frame, looking scruffy and a little rough with two adorable kids that I'm playing with and talking to. 

    Simply put: baby wearing has made our family life better.  I can't imagine doing this parenting thing any other way.  Whether it’s the messages sent to my kids about papas as nurturers or the freedom it gives me, allowing me to live life in tandem with my children, having my little ones in a sling makes me happy.  It's helped me feel like a better parent, even in hard times, and has without question helped my children develop into people who aren't simply passengers (though they are literally) in my life, but participants in OUR life together.

     

     

    Sunday
    Jun262011

    giveaway: baby k'tan! CLOSED!

    This giveaway is now CLOSED. Please stay tuned for the announcement of our winner!

    This is a joint giveaway cross-posted on very, very fine and Natural Parents Network. You may enter at one site only. Please find the section marked “Win it!” for the mandatory main entry and optional bonus entries.

    Despite owning more baby carriers, slings and wraps than one person could ever wear out in one lifetime, I was thrilled to get the opportunity to try one that I'd overlooked when my son was still tiny: the Baby K'tan. Assuming that, because it was made from soft jersey fabric, it was only suitable for very young infants, I thought my near 30 pound, 17 month-old and I had missed the boat. Similar stretchy wraps had been overwhelming to me as a new mama, though I knew others who used and loved them. Two friends, in particular, raved about their K'tan as though it were a tremendously helpful member of the family. When I read that the Baby K'tan could accommodate a toddler up to 35 pounds, I was excited to put it to the test, and if it proved as magical as my friends had said, I was hopeful that it might see me through another kid or two.

    The Two Hip Position

    In the box: The Baby K'tan is a carrier made of two connected loops of fabric. It comes with a sash, necessary for certain carrying positions, and a matching hat for your babe. While I'm not one for logos on my kid's clothes, the cute factor is undeniable and I would definitely make an exception for the sake of a complete ensemble of this super soft, rich brown cotton. The sash doubles as a storage bag -- a handy detail I really appreciated. You also get a user's manual with photo-illustrated instructions for several different carries, including two suitable for twins!

    Using the Baby K'tan: I'll admit: I didn't have high hopes for the comfort of this carrier. We've been a back-carrying duo for quite awhile and the idea of my excited, curious (flailing, reaching) toddler on my front -- or even strapped onto my hip -- was daunting. When I loaded him into the hug position though, he cuddled right up and, to my complete shock, felt light. The way the Baby K'tan distributes weight is nothing short of amazing; I imagine that carrying an infant in the K'tan must be like wearing a slightly heavier T-shirt. The hip position and two hip position, both shown in the instruction manual, were equally comfortable for me, though less restrictive and so, less calming for my little guy, but I could easily see him hitching a ride in the K'tan around the farmers' market when he gets tired of walking. A few months ago, when snuggles were higher on his priority list, he'd have stayed put in the K'tan all day.

    One reason stretchy wraps have never really appealed to me is bulk. In the winter, an extra layer is helpful but I worried about feeling mummified in warm weather. In the K'tan, I can honestly say that my shirt did not feel irrelevant and, thanks to the careful sizing, I wasn't swimming in extra fabric. For parents of different sizes who need or like to share carriers this would be a drawback, but the lack of bunching, extra wrapping and tucking was a definite plus for me.

    The Hug Position

    As someone who has never before used a stretchy wrap, the positions were not really intuitive for me and required a few readings of the directions and rehearsals sans kid. I recommend being sure you understand the positioning and order of operations before enlisting the cooperation of your squirming baby. That said, with practice, I think it would become second nature just as using any carrier does, especially given the comfort level once everyone is in place. Luckily, the Baby K'tan website features supplemental videos for each type of carry -- a helpful resource for the more visual learners and occasionally forgetful but smartphone-toting among us. With a younger baby, this would be my go-to carrier of choice and I look forward to using it for another six pounds with this child!

    BUY IT!

    To purchase your own Baby K'tan visit their website. In addition to baby carriers, they also sell jewelry, clothing and other handy accessories to make aspects of your life a little easier.

    WIN IT!

    For your chance to win a Baby K'tan carrier, enter in the comments below! This contest is only open to the U.S. MAIN ENTRY: Tell us why you would like to try this type of carrier. Leave a valid email address in your comments (the line where it says “email address”) so we can contact you if you win. Email addresses are not made publicly visible. This is a joint giveaway with very, very fine and Natural Parents Network. You may enter at one site only, and we’ll be recording IP addresses to ensure that there are no duplicate entries. That said, please do visit and enjoy both sites! BONUS ENTRIES, to increase your chance of winning (leave a separate comment for each so we can count them all):

    • Tell us another product on the Baby K'tan website that you would like to have.
    • Subscribe to Natural Parents Network in a reader or by email.
    • Subscribe to the very, very fine RSS feed.
    • Leave a relevant comment on a non-giveaway article at very, very fine and tell us which post (comment on separate posts for up to 3 entries total).
    • Leave a relevant comment on a non-giveaway article at Natural Parents Network and tell us which post (comment on separate posts for up to 3 entries total).
    • Follow @NatParNet on Twitter and leave your Twitter name in the comment.
    • Tweet about this giveaway (up to 5 times total, at least 24 hours apart). You can tweet this text: #Win a Baby K'tan carrier in a @NatParNet #giveaway! http://bit.ly/lx6wVo {7.24, US}
    • Like Natural Parents Network on Facebook.
    • Enter another of the current giveaways on Natural Parents Network (1 extra entry per giveaway — check back for more!).
    • Post this giveaway on your Facebook page or wall and leave the link (1 entry). You can use this status update: Win a Baby K'tan carrier from @Natural Parents Network. Contest ends July 24 and is open to the US. Be sure to attach the contest URL to your update! (http://naturalparentsnetwork.com/giveaway-baby-ktan/)
    • Put the Natural Parents Network badge on your website or add http://NaturalParentsNetwork.com to your text blogroll for 2 extra entries each. The HTML code for the badge is in the right sidebar. Leave your site URL in the comment.

    RULES:

    • Contest is open ONLY TO US.
    • Leave each entry as a separate comment so we can count them all.
    • Contestants may enter at either very, very fine or Natural Parents Network but not both. Entries will be combined for the drawing of a single winner.
    • For actions like following and subscribing, if you already follow or subscribe, just let us know in your comment.
    • For tasks that garner you multiple entries, you can copy and paste the comment with a #1, #2, etc.
    • You don’t have to do any of the bonus entries, but you do have to complete the first mandatory one.
    • We will pick the winner through Random.org after the contest closes and send an email notification. Leave a valid email address as you comment so we can contact you if you win. If we can’t reach a winner or don’t hear back within a couple days, we’ll draw a new name.
    • Any questions, email: ShannonR {at} NaturalParentsNetwork.com

    Contest closes July 24 at 11:59 p.m. PST.

    Disclosure: Our reviewer purchased the Baby K'tan for review. We try to seek out only products we think you would find relevant and useful to your life as a natural parent. If we don’t like a product, we won’t be recommending it to you. See our full disclosure policy here.

    Tuesday
    May102011

    tutorial: a little sling

    We were in Seattle for the weekend, staying in Bellevue while Nathan attended a yearbook teachers' thing, with plenty of time for walking around the enormous mall right across the street from our hotel. The only good score of our mall excursion(s) was a little Corolle baby with whom George fell instantly in love. I decided that he needed a carrier for Baby Tony (as he has since been dubbed), so I set out to make one. It worked! It's cute! And it took me about 15 minutes to make. 

    (You only need two D rings, but I had a 4 pack lying around.)

     

     

    Wednesday
    Jan192011

    Wordless Wednesday: a year ago